It’s really crazy how someone who pissed you off when you were a kid, and someone who you saw puke a million times at parties and don’t remember partying with, and puked on the side of your car avoid just go like that.
No, I wasn’t that close to Shawn, but he provided many great memories, and was an extremely important person. He had dreams and goals, and his best friend is one of my close friends.
It hurts to see my friend going through all of this. I didn’t even know what to say to him. All I wanted to do was be there for him, and help out however I could.
I keep seeing the body I had before I lost weight.
When I look down at my tummy and how my pants squish the fat up, I still see my old body.
When I see my weight on the scale, I think I’ll never reach my goal.
I wish I had the time and energy I had last summer to cook healthier and to plan out my meals for the week.
I hope I still have this determination to drink less when the school year starts…
I just want to feel healthy and confident again. All this stress with school and work just throws all that away for me… I need more self-control. I can’t be tempted to get a burger at Wendy’s just because my friends are getting food there. And just because everything tastes better with ice cream doesn’t mean I always have to eat ice cream! Just because my mom is allowing me to try each slice of cake at the bakery doesn’t mean I need to get all of that!
I need to work on me again. I need to work on my health. I feel confident about my workouts. I WANT TO PLAY THE PIANO AGAIN! I want to enjoy the rest of my summer!